What My Parents Taught Me

• Raising three kids with little income SUCKS. But it is doable.
• Butter tubs can be washed and reused like a million times. So can dish towels.
  
• You can put a whole week's leftovers in a big pot, add some noodles and call it goulash. They'll eat it or they'll starve.
• With some juggling, you CAN keep four checks from bouncing before pay day.
• Three kids, two dogs, four cats, two pigs, one goat and eight chickens are just plain fun.
• You can fit a potbellied pig in the back of a 1993 Pontiac station wagon, though getting the smell out is kind of tricky.
• Spray painting said station wagon gray looks tacky.
  
• You can stretch laundry detergent twice as long if you dilute it.
• Speaking of laundry, who needs fancy dryer sheets?
• The "look" does exist.
• Sometimes, you just don't want to know what your kids were up to while you were gone.
  
• Deer are especially attracted to big green minivans.
  
• If all else fails, drag them to the country.
• Get one great dog for your kids to grow up with.
• Keep giving away the cats.
• Seventeen cats = millions of fleas. Better just move.
• If what you did to get in trouble makes mom laugh, she probably won't punish you.
  
• When you can't find your mom or that tub of ice cream, it's probably best to let her be lost for a while.
• If your eyes wonder for half a second in Wal-Mart, it will take you 2 hours to find your mom again.
  
• Lifelong friends are to be cherished... especially when they have really embarrassing stories to tell about you.
• You only need a minimal amount of toilet paper for your small butt.
• Swamp coolers ROCK.
• Behave in church. Mom can pinch with her toes.
  

To be continued......
***Notes from Mom***
Its so funny hearing my memories retold by you guys! (Wait until it happens to you.) By the way...2 different station wagons. I got Percy home in a Tracer 4 door hatchback, like a mini-mini station wagon. The big, ugly gray thing was a big, ugly gray thing, the difference is people thinking that we put a little pot-bellied pig in a big station wagon when actually I put a 150 lb hog in the back of an economy hatchback.

Gotta give credit where credit is due.