Today I went to the child support office and officially forgave three thousand some odd dollars, AGAIN. Apparently the first time wasn't good enough for them. So we signed court orders declaring this and forgiving that and then we were left alone while she went to make copies of said orders. THE LONGEST 94 SECONDS OF MY LIFE. While nothing was said, I could tell there were a lot of unspoken words in the air. Maybe they were all from me. Probably. There were some unspoken un-words there too, like f*$#%ng $&*t and d@$& !*s. When it was over and done, I heard a meek "thanks" as I was leaving. I said he was welcome. Getting in the car I found myself utterly PISSED OFF. Why? I don't know. I really don't. I have no regrets about the decisions I've made concerning him and Lily. BUT.... through prayer and time alone with God, I think I got it all out of me. The candy bar helped too. Godspeed, Bio.
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