My mom, sister and I (oh, and TK) hung out for a while the other day. We wondered around Hobby Lobby and a couple of other places. I'm not real sure what our intention was, probably just "bond" or whatever. Whenever we're all together someone always manages a comment or two about mom's phone.
Because she keeps it in her bra.
And I don't know why but while she was driving we all hear a *click*.
"What was that?"
--Mom turns the wheel--
"I think my phone is taking pictures!"
"Ewww! Pictures of what?!"
"I guess whatever's in my bra!"
Oh. Em. Gee.
Hey mom don't bust a u-turn, we may all get a media message we DO NOT WANT TO OPEN.

Wedgie Free

"Mom, why do I have to wear underwear that come up to my belly button?"
"Because you're ten and unmarried and that's the rule around here."
"But none of my friend's wear that kind..."
"Well, what kind do they wear?"
"I dunno...the kind that doesn't give you wedgies..."

Lily and I have this conversation almost daily until I give in and buy her some new underwear. I get them home, she tries them on and glory be! Wedgie free!

You know how I know?

"Mom look!"
--shakes her butt--
"No wedgie!!"
--dances around--
"Now wedgie!!"
--lays on her back and puts her ankles behind her head--



Nerves of Steal

Two days ago, the kids and I were walking out of the library through those tall, "unpaid-for item" detectors and Caleb asked what they were for. Being the ever-helpful parent, I explained what they were and how they worked... to my chagrin. Next on my to-do list was grocery shopping. We passed through a set of similar detectors on the way out.
You can guess what happened next, right?
Caleb loudly exclaims:
I don't know why I wasn't tackled by security. Maybe the holiday spirit?