Yesterday's Prayers

Lord, Please send my kids a random insect to be occupied with so I can sleep just five minutes longer. Amen.
Holy Father, please guide my sleeping body down the stairs so that I don't fall and break my neck because I have been ordered to make pancakes this morning. Amen.
Jesus, thank You for DVD players and DVDs. Amen.
Dear Jesus, please have mercy on me and let me skip this month. PLEASE. Amen.
Dear Jesus, thanks for considering it anyway. Amen.
Lord, please let me have just one more box of macaroni and cheese in the pantry. Amen.
Father, please forgive me for making Lily help Caleb change his pull-up because changing 50 a day can get pretty daunting, and hey she wasn't doing much anyway. Amen.
Jesus, please guide this turkey sandwich away from my hips. Thank you! Amen.
Lord, please forgive me for rescuing five ice cream sandwiches from the freezer in under an hour. Amen.
Jesus, will You stop up the neighbor's dog so he'll quit crapping in my garden? Thanks! Amen.
Dear Lord, just three more hours. Please get me through these final three hours.... Amen.
Holy Father, thank You for chlorine pools that clean children just as good as a regular bath would. Amen.
Holy One, please let this rotten child go to sleep soon. Amen.
Jesus, thank You again for DVD players! Amen.
Dear Lord, I thank You for today and pray that we all... ZZZZZZZZZZZ

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