Here, Kitty Kitty

I love my friend's kids.
They're so.... indescribably unique.
I gave her a couple of tampons to try, and a few days later she found her seven year old son with one unwrapped, dangling it over the side of his bed, trying to lure the cat out by swinging it back and forth. Classic!
Today I spied a paper plate with the following message written by her eight year old daughter:
"Bye Mom. I am becoming a homeless person because I can't take Skylar. (turn over) I'll visit you on holidays. She presses my self-destruct button." My friend told me she actually had a bag packed with a change of clothes, her CD player and a can of Lysol to disinfect the spot she chose to sleep. This is the same child that told me I didn't make her feel peaceful. She kind of freaks me out, to be honest.
We have discovered that Lily is allergic to cats, which really sucks because she really loves cats. I have to remind her to put the cat down and she always replies "Oh I forgot. I'm lellergic."

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