So last night I was feeling my age and decided to take a nice, hot bath with my new Aloe Vera bath beads. I turned on the water and cruised the Internet for a little bit. I went back in the bathroom and added my beads, turned the water off. Then I went to get in and KERPLOOSH!!! Half of the water spilled out over the sides and onto the floor. Guess a five foot by one foot bathtub can't hold 50 gallons of water and a 220 lb. woman. FINE. I didn't want that much water in here anyway!
So I go about my business and lay down to get my hair wet. Guess what? KERPLOOSH!! There goes another 20 gallons or so. Way to stroke the old ego there. By now I'm frustrated and not at all relaxed, so I wash my hair and soap up my washcloth. I get my upper body done but now I have to raise my lower body to wash it. I decide I don't have the arm strength to put my hands on either side of the bathtub and push myself up so I bend my left leg, and turn so that my other leg lengthens with the intention to thus get on my knees and stand from there (I was tired y'all). But now.... I'm stuck. My butt and my knee have me in a strange sort of vice grip and I..... can't really move. After cursing a little I grab the box of bath beads and pour the rest over me, lathering me up so my knee could slip an inch or so and break the boxing in it had created with my butt. I decided that the bath beads made my lower half clean enough and just got out. I think I'll stick with showers from now on....

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