What My Parents Taught Me

  • Raising three kids with little income SUCKS. But it is doable.
  • Butter tubs can be washed and reused like a million times. So can dish towels.
  • You can put a whole week's leftovers in a big pot, add some noodles and call it goulash. They'll eat it or they'll starve.
  • With some juggling, you CAN keep four checks from bouncing before pay day.
  • Three kids, two dogs, four cats, two pigs, one goat and eight chickens are just plain fun.
  • You can fit a potbellied pig in the back of a 1993 Pontiac station wagon, though getting the smell out is kind of tricky.
  • Spray painting said station wagon gray looks tacky.
  • You can stretch laundry detergent twice as long if you dilute it.
  • Speaking of laundry, who needs fancy dryer sheets?
  • The "look" does exist.
  • Sometimes, you just don't want to know what your kids were up to while you were gone.
  • Deer are especially attracted to big green minivans.
  • If all else fails, drag them to the country.
  • Get one great dog for your kids to grow up with.
  • Keep giving away the cats.
  • Seventeen cats = millions of fleas. Better just move.
  • If what you did to get in trouble makes mom laugh, she probably won't punish you.
  • When you can't find your mom or that tub of ice cream, it's probably best to let her be lost for a while.
  • If your eyes wonder for half a second in Wal-Mart, it will take you 2 hours to find your mom again.
  • Lifelong friends are to be cherished... especially when they have really embarrassing stories to tell about you.
  • You only need a minimal amount of toilet paper for your small butt.
  • Swamp coolers ROCK.
  • Behave in church. Mom can pinch with her toes.
To be continued......
***Notes from Mom***
Its so funny hearing my memories retold by you guys! (Wait until it happens to you.) By the way...2 different station wagons. I got Percy home in a Tracer 4 door hatchback, like a mini-mini station wagon. The big, ugly gray thing was a big, ugly gray thing, the difference is people thinking that we put a little pot-bellied pig in a big station wagon when actually I put a 150 lb hog in the back of an economy hatchback.

Gotta give credit where credit is due.

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